Harvard Graduate

How do you get a Harvard graduate off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.

Joke of the Day

This wonderful weather we are having in April.

I AM TIRED OF SNOW!

Teacher: "Little Johnny, give me a sentence using the word, 'geometry.'"

Little Johnny: "A little acorn grew and grew until it finally awoke one day and said, 'Gee, I'm a tree.'"

Devil in Church

One Sunday morning, Satan appeared before a small town congregation. Everyone started screaming and running for the front church door, trampling each other in a frantic effort to get away.

Soon, everyone was gone, except for an elderly gentleman who sat calmly. Satan walked up to the man and said, "Don't you know who I am?"

The man replied, "Yep, sure do."

Satan asked, "Aren't you going to run?"

"Nope, sure ain't," said the man.

Perturbed, Satan asked, "Why aren't you afraid of me?"

The man calmly replied, "Been married to your sister for over 48 years."

You might be a redneck...

You might be a redneck if you think duct tape is spelled duck tape

Chuck Norris Joke

When Chuck Norris was 3 years old, he was bored
And decided to carve a sculpture wit ony his
Baby toe nail, this sculpture is now called....
Mount Rushmore